Forget Me Not Ch.49 TEASER :D

Hey guys!

I honestly have no idea if this is posting on time or not?? But it's not a three month wait so I guess I'm doing well anyways :D

We left Edward in a very dark place in the last chapter, and I decided to leave Bella alone for now to concentrate on E. This whole chapter is EPOV and I'd like to point out that while "not much" is happening, we are skipping forward through a few weeks in each chapter. Keep that in mind while reading :D

Onwards!

Chapter 49 - The Heart Never Lies

I’d begged Kate to take me off the pills, and it took her days to even slightly agree. She told me again and again that I couldn’t just stop taking them, that she was afraid of what I might do if I no longer had them.

She tried to tell me just how bad I was, but I couldn’t remember a time before them, so I had no idea if she was lying or not. She promised me eventually – after a week of begging – that she’d severely drop my dosage and only ever give me stronger pills when it was clear I needed them.

I didn’t ask how she would know. I didn’t want to know what was going through her head as she jotted down a new dosage for my dad to pick up at the hospital. There was something in her eyes when she looked at me, like she was scared, unsure of her decision.

If she was scared, then surely that meant I should be too. I didn’t want to be scared; I was a fucking coward and decided that I didn’t want to know in advance what I might go through in the future. I didn’t want to be constantly waiting around for my world to crash around my ears.

I didn’t know just how much she’d lowered my dosage by, but as the week passed, it was obvious it was miniscule if anything. I didn’t feel any better than I had, I still spaced out on way more occasions than I should have, and I slept all the fucking time.

The pain in my chest didn’t go away, I kept thinking maybe it would lessen with time, with pills, with seeing Bella every day at school, but it was always there, and always intensified tenfold when I lay on my bed at night.

Kate took to telling me that people who often go through breakups experience the same grief similar to when someone dies. She told me the same thing every time we had a new “session,” as if continually rubbing in that Bella was gone was best for me.

Maybe it was.

I’d given up fighting her on most things. I hadn’t given up fighting for me, or for Bella, but I had to trust that Carlisle and Kate knew what they were doing. If she thought keeping me on my medication was best, then it was.

I fucking hated the grogginess that settled over me – usually around mid-afternoon – but my body was beginning to finally rebuild its strength, and when night came, I was actually functional.

I continued to go to school, I continued to watch Bella like a hawk, but things had changed irrevocably. She was hurting too, and while it was wrong, I took comfort in that. Breaking up had been her idea, and no matter how hard I tried, there were still times when I wondered if she’d actually wanted to go separate ways and had just used me as an excuse.

Of course, in times of lucidity I knew that was ridiculous. I knew she loved me, maybe even more than I’d loved her at the time, and seeing the change in her at school led me to believe that us being apart was as hard on her as it was on me.

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This chapter should be up on Sunday :D

xx

Royal Duty Ch.8 TEASER :D

Hey everybody!

If you haven't already heard, my poor little laptop has a serious virus at the moment!! Unfortunately, this means that while it's been down for the last week, I've dropped behind on my pre-written chapters.

I do have three pre-written chapters of Royal Duty left, but I'd like to let you know that I'm going to space out my updates by a few more days - so ten days instead of a week - that kind of thing, just so I can get back on top of things.

As I said at the start, this fic isn't particularly long. I'm trying to get it finished in 20 chapters, but if you  know me, then you'll know that probably won't happen. I'm hoping anyways!!

So, I'm managing to get this out to you in the mean time, and I'd like you all to cross your fingers that I can continue to use my laptop for the next few days because between my four in progress fics, I have a lot of shit to do!!

I hope to have this chapter up by the weekend, and I hope you enjoy the teaser in the meantime :D:D

Onwards...

Chapter 8 - Show Time

“He should be in bed,” she remarked kindly.

“I asked him if he was up to it, but he was insistent.”

“Of course he was. This is your engagement party. And in that dress? You can’t blame him for wanting every man in this room to see you with him.” My jaw dropped as Alison giggled lightly. I was unsure as to whether Alec had filled her in on “the situation,” but her next comment told me he hadn’t.

“That boy is mad about you. He probably didn’t want to let you down. Maybe you could play it off as him being lovesick?” She giggled again, and I tried to join in but it died in my throat, making her look at me in concern.

“I didn’t mean to speak out of turn, Princess. Forgive me.” She bowed her head slightly, and I told myself to get a grip.

“Not at all, Alison. There is nothing to forgive. I’m a little nervous tonight, is all.”

“He won’t let you down, Princess, he’s been waiting for tonight for a very long time after all. I guess you both have.” She smiled as Alec and Edward re-joined us, taking her husband’s arm and both of them bidding us goodbye.

I played her words down. She’d clearly just read the article and, like was supposed to happen, believed every word. It did surprise me that Alec hadn’t told her the truth about us, however. Before she was diagnosed with cancer, she used to work in the palace gardens and, like her husband, knew everything that went on behind its doors.

My hand was back in Edward’s, and I didn’t know how it got there. Had I reached out and weaved my fingers through his without realising? Or was I so caught up in the riddles I’d been living with for weeks that I hadn’t noticed Edward’s gentle touch. I turned to find him with his eyes shut and breathing deeply and decided I must have done it because he was in no state to do anything

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See you all soon!! xx

Royal Duty Ch.7 TEASER :D

Hey all!

Tis that time, Edward is back and things are moving forward! Yay, let's get on with it shall we?

Enjoy x

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Chapter 7 - The Engagement Party

Our engagement interview was aired that night on the six o’clock news. The reporters remarked on how happy and relaxed we looked together, how naturally we seemed to handle the questions, the sadness surrounding our story, and the fairytale ending we seemed to have secured.

The engagement was everywhere. Only one official photo had been released, a shot of the two of us standing arm in arm, my engagement ring in full view and smiles on both of our faces.

My dress and hair were critiqued in every magazine, and it didn’t take long for copies to hit the shelves for the “everyday” woman to purchase.

I tried to ignore everything as much as I could. Instead, I found myself in a constant bubble of thought. Thoughts that only centred on one thing: Edward. I couldn’t get him out of my head. Every time I turned a corner in the palace I thought saw him. Every time I heard someone speaking with a similar tone of voice, my heart went into overdrive.

When he told me he was leaving, I knew I’d miss him, but I wasn’t aware of just how much.

My mother had knocked on the door to my suite the night he left to tell me his car had just pulled out of the garage. She seemed surprised that he had packed a few bags into the boot, but I reassured her he was coming back. Or at least, I thought I was reassuring her. It turned out I was trying to assure myself.

“Honey, that boy is mad about you. Nothing would be able to keep him away.” She held me close, and for the first time in weeks, I let someone else comfort me.

“But why? I don’t get it, I’ve been so mean to him…” I shuddered at the thought, and my mother’s arms tightened around me as she rocked me back and forth on the sofa.

“Have you spoken to him? Really spoken to him?” she prodded.

I nodded my head and pulled back, letting her take my hands in hers and gazing upon her soft features.

“He told me he’d wait for as long as it took for me to trust him before we got married, but it seemed like he wanted to say something else.” I knew in my heart what it was; he wanted me to love him before we got married, but saying it aloud was a terrifying thought.

“He said he wrote the story we told the press and that it wasn’t a lie…I don’t understand what he was talking about. I was too busy trying to think up ways to make him stay…but he left, mother. He’s gone…”

“But he is coming back…Isabella, these last few weeks have been hard on him, too. He has no family here, no friends. I know he hoped you two would become close, but you haven’t given him the chance to get to know you…he just needs a couple of weeks to find his bearings and probably say goodbye to his old life.”

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Should be up in the next few days!

Sarah x

Forget Me Not Ch.48 TEASER :D

Hey guys!

I know this one is overdue! I was doing so well with the schedule, but work has been kicking my ass the last two weeks so I had no time whatsoever to write!

I sat down today and managed to hammer out the chapter though. I have to warn you that it's dark...much darker than I thought it was going to be. Maybe I should be worried at how easily I can write darkness and angst?

Anyways, the chapter will be up as soon as I get replies out to your wonderful reviews on ffn :D

Enjoy x

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Chapter 48 - Darkness

Every night before sleep took me, I felt the same raw pain in my chest.

It was like it waited in the darkness for me, and pounced the second I was at my most vulnerable.

I was trying to deal with it.

I was adamant that it wasn’t going to break me, but fighting it, quelling it, was the hardest thing I think I’ve ever had to do.

Tears fell silently onto my pillow as I recalled the pain in Edward’s voice when I told him it was over. My heart would replay the pain it felt at the time, over and over, intensifying it in my loneliness. I knew it was for the best, but it was ripping me to shreds and I had no idea how to stop it from destroying me.

Jasper could tell. Hell, I think everyone could tell. They all watched me carefully at school, deliberately avoiding the topic of Edward altogether. Alice pulled me away from my locker and into a tight hug one afternoon before I went to biology – alone, as Edward had yet to come back to school – but that been the extent of it. Other than that, it was one massive elephant in the room that no one wanted to address.

It wasn’t until the following Monday that my strength was truly put to the test. Edward was back at school. I watched with mounting anxiety as his silver Volvo pulled into the school parking lot. I noticed him slow down as he entered, turning his wheels in the direction of my truck, but at the last minute he zoomed over to the opposite side and parked by the trees.

I knew it was inevitable, that he had to come back. I overheard Alice telling Jasper in the lunch queue on Friday that he was still recovering from the aftereffects of his panic attack. She said he was weak, suffering from migraines and irritable. She also said that he was becoming restless, staring at his phone when he thought no one was looking and spending equal amounts staring at his car keys.

The end of her sentence hung in the air. I wasn’t sure if they knew I’d heard, but we all knew what the latter of all of that stemmed from. He wanted me to call, or at least reply to the three texts he’d sent me. He was staring at his car keys because he was fighting the overwhelming urge to run away again. Whether he wanted to come and see me was another thing, I was genuinely unsure whether he wanted that or not.

I knew my breaking up with him was somewhat of a final straw for him, but with the positive things Alice whispered, I found solace in the fact that it had been the right thing to do. She’d returned home from school to find him talking heatedly with his therapist. I found out she was now staying with the Cullens, and Edward was getting around the clock care. She said, loud enough this time for me to hear, the he had refused antidepressants and drugs, saying he wanted to know if he was strong enough to get through it on his own.

My heart welled with pride the same time my eyes pricked with tears. He must have been so scared, so alone and so hurt, but he was fighting it by himself, adamant that he do it on his own. He was so much stronger than he realized, and I hoped he’d come to the same realization as me – that he could do it on his own.

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Chapter should be up by the weekend!! :D